my life with depression.com

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yes. my therapist was happy with my progress and enjoyed all of my ’stories’. i’ve not seen her since i left for paris. so that’s like five weeks now.

she asked me why i think i am sooo energized and motivated. after all, the last time she saw me, i was not doing so well. i came up with a bunch of excuses … from getting to take more french lessons to the french bread to the croissant to meeting and talking to new frenchies to having THAT talk with S2BX about the divorce - regardless of whether we didn’t want to proceed or not - to my increase in socializing.

i guess it was the socializing thing. i socialized HEAVILY in paris and after coming back, i was miss. socializer again.



i guess i’d have to agree. my personality isn’t the type that can grow in front of a computer all day. i get my energy from other people. she said that as we interact with different people, we are able to see different parts of our personality. when we see those different parts, we feel good about ourselves. after all, prior to my trip, i did go see these people. i’ve been wanting and they’ve been wanting to see me/them for a year now. i guess for me, it was just a matter of time. i was just pushing everyone out of my life and i didn’t feel like ’socializing’.



perfect example of my COGNITIVE BEHAVIORAL THERAPY (CBT)

she was also glad that i wasn’t impulsive and answered right away when S2BX offered 80% of everything last saturday. she’s glad that i’m giving myself time to absorb the information and to think about it. being that i’m emotionally charged, i have the tendency to react quickly to things. sometimes i’m happy with the outcome, but usually i find that the situation is made more difficult. [WOW! that’s like bare bones honesty and vulnerability right there for me.]

we talked about the time between the event and the reaction as being the most important time. this time needs to be waited on so that decisions can be made with logic and not clouded by emotions. i told her i read a book that talked about an average IQ guy having more potential to being successful than a high IQ guy WITH all the business connections in the world. and it all has to do with emotional intelligence. i think that i will write more on this soon. it was a really good book.

oh, i’m suppose to think about why i have such a hard time getting money that is suppose to be mine. and why i can take this type of compliment: “are you sure you’ve only taken 5 weeks of french lessons because you’re really good” but not this kind: “hi. i just wanted to tell you that you are really cute”. [ both times during my travel back from paris to the states ]




[ MORE: on socializing ]